This month’s webinar was entitled “How to be happy”. Everything we do is because we think it will make us happy. Every desire we give birth to is with the objective of finding happiness. But happiness is an inside job – it has nothing to do with the things we do or the things we have. People who have everything material that they could wish for can be unhappy, and people who have seemingly wonderful lives can feel dissatisfied. I’ve seen children scavenging for treasures in heaps of garbage squeal with more pleasure than children with a roomful of toys; I’ve seen my own children derive more pleasure out of an empty box than the toy that came in it!
As I’ve thought about these things, observed the world around me and listened to Abraham and other teachers, I’ve found that there are four things that lead us towards finding joy and maintaining it, these are:
- Understanding our guidance
- Knowing when we go to the dump
- Use a firedrill or an anchor
Understanding our guidance is the starting point. There are really only two ways to feel; good or bad. However, the intensity of these feelings varies from subject to subject, and from person to person. What makes me very happy, may be relatively unimportant to someone else. Do you know what your sweet spot feels like? Do you have a benchmark for what feels happy to you? Do you remember how it feels to play with a balloon or blow bubbles or have a pillow fight, or lay on the grass and look at the clouds float by or gaze at the stars with wonder and amazement, or stand in a boat with the breeze blowing on your face? Can you close your eyes and recall any of those things that make you feel truly free and happy? That’s your happy benchmark – anything that makes you return to that feeling makes you feel truly happy. But we don’t have to wait for things to change to be happy because we can close our eyes and hit that sweet spot every time. Nothing has to change for me to be happy because I take my “happy” with me.
When something feels bad, people often think that it must be bad – where as all it means is that you are not aligned with it, in other words you are taking action too soon. A lot of times people start out feeling good about something they are intending to do, but they lose their mojo some where along the way and that is why sometimes the best of things falls short of expectations. I see it happen most often when people start a project that is a ton of fun but after a few days the fun is gone and it becomes a chore – because they were initially aligned with it but could not sustain their alignment.
Many people lose touch with their feelings because they are so used to being in a place that does not feel good, they forget what true joy and freedom feel like – for them reconnecting with a benchmark is important because it gives them a way of measuring their own emotions.
If your guidance is telling you that you are not feeling good about something, all that means is that you are not looking at it the same way God or Source is looking at the same subject. If you look at some one and feel bad for them, then you are looking at them as being helpless, and Source is looking at them as powerful beings who can have, be or do anything they want.
This means that you are going to the dump or that you are thinking thoughts that deviate from the way Source is thinking – so all you have to do is to shift your thoughts. Most of the time our thoughts are on autopilot and we don’t even know where thoughts are coming from. When we become conscious of the way we think our thoughts, we gain creative control over our lives. Thoughts buzz through our heads at great speed, so in a space of 17 seconds we have already thought 3-4 thoughts of the same type of vibration. Within 68 seconds we can get enough momentum going so that we can get carried away on a train of thought without knowing it. However, if we could stop the momentum from building much more than 68 seconds we could stop that train of thought and get on a train that is deliberately heading in the direction we want it to go. As long as we think thoughts of appreciation about our past, our now and our future, we will be heading towards joy. God’s system of granting wishes is fair and consistent: those who appreciate always have more to appreciate and those who complain always have more to complain about. And that brings us to the topic of Trust.
Trusting means knowing that God’s system is fair and always working – therefore if something that we want is not coming to us, it can only mean one thing – we are not thinking about it the way God is thinking about it. When we think about things and people the way God thinks about them, we practice unconditional love. Trust means always knowing that things are working out for us, and that the only thing we need to change is our own habit of thought. Prepaving is a tool that helps us to work the first three variables: guidance, thought and trust. When we pre-pave or set our intentions we feel and think with appreciation, and when we appreciate we learn to trust.
Pre-paving is one of the most important things I have learnt from Abraham. Just pre-paving alone has the potential of changing your life for the better if you would do it consistently over a period of time.
Pre-paving simply means, setting an intention for a block of time. It’s that age old principle that says “if you don’t have a plan of your own, you become part of someone else’s plan”. When you pre-pave you give your focused energy to what you want – you create a plan. You would agree that having a goal, and objective, a plan is a much better way to go about things than not. Imagine getting into your car and just sitting there waiting for it to take you somewhere. You wouldn’t think of doing that would you? But every day in so many ways we don’t give ourselves clear directions about what we want to achieve in a segment of time, and as a result we don’t harness the complete resources of our minds and bodies, and we don’t call upon the resources of the non-physical energies that are all around us waiting to help us in any way we desire.
“I am so blessed to have this work that puts food on my table and helps me achieve my financial goals. I appreciate that my work is so close to work. I appreciate the people that I work with. Today I want to do my best at work and come away at the end of the day feeling happy and satisfied with everything I have accomplished.”
It only takes a minute to do but it puts me in a good place as I start my work day. During my work day I will pre-pave anything that needs special focus. If there is a project I need to work on or a client that I am going to see that I want to accomplish something with, I will pre-pave.
I always pre-pave my morning walk saying something like “I want my physical body to benefit from my exercise. I want to feel energized for my day, happy and alive. “
I pre-pave cooking for my family simply by saying “love is part of my ingredients, I want this meal to turn out perfect, and I want to enjoy watching my children eat it”. Then I pre-pave eating by saying “thank you for this meal, I want my body to benefit from what I am eating, my body knows what to do, it will take what it needs and get rid of the rest”.
I always pre-pave hugging my children intending that they will feel loved. I pre-pave interacting with my loved ones to strengthen our relationships. I always ask to be unconditional in all my interactions and co-creations. Practicing unconditional love is the other most powerful ingredient of living a happy and fulfilled life. My life is full of love; my home is a very happy, warm and comfortable place. There is no clutter in my world, everything has a place, and simplicity is the hallmark of my taste in décor.
I pre-pave before my meditation class intending that all who will attend will benefit, that I will allow the answers from Source to the questions that come to me from those in the room. I pre-pave my webinars. I pre-pave writing my books. I pre-pave all my coaching sessions, intending to benefit all those I play with.
I pre-pave going grocery shopping, and shopping of any kind, asking to find everything I want at the best prices and the shortest time. I even pre-pave going to the movies or an outing with my children, asking for all of us to have a fantastic time.
I pre-pave going to bed using Abraham’s words “I am going to bed now, and because my thoughts will be inactive attraction will stop. My physical body will be completely relaxed at every level, I will sleep well and awaken refreshed with another new positive point of attraction”. With those words I hit the pillow and am asleep within 30 seconds – you know why? because I have a very satisfying day every day, and because I trust that all is well, and things are always working out for me.
Can you imagine how satisfied I feel with all my activities because I pre-pave and I trust that Source is always looking out for me. All prayers are answered and pre-paving is a prayer with a definitive objective about a definite period of time.
You see, pre-paving is an integral part of how I live life. It keeps me focused on what I want to achieve, it also keeps me consciously aware of the presence of Source and the fact that I need non-physical to assist me at every step of the way.
If you were to ask me, what one thing you could do that would have the most benefit in helping you be happy and achieve everything you want in life, I would say pre-pave everything.
Lastly, fire drills for our heads – are simply practiced strategies that help us to go up the emotional scale at will. There is more on this subject here. Whenever you feel overwhelmed or you feel your thoughts are taking you to the dump, use your fire drill to soothe you, and take you up the emotional scale. It’s good to know what to do to raise your vibration under any and all circumstances. Basically, what we want to achieve is an emotional level above the worry line before taking any action. Where it is okay to think thoughts and feel emotions that are low on the emotional scale, acting from a place of negative thought or emotion will result in manifestations that are less satisfying to you as compared to the manifestations that will come your way from a higher place on the emotional scale. A fire drill or anchor help us to refocus our attention in a way that improves our vibration. We can use words or sounds or images to anchor ourselves. Taking a couple of deep breaths is always recommended as the first step. I like to breathe in “love” and breathe out “appreciation”. This reminds me that love and appreciation are the most important things in life, and that realization is enough to help me to refocus myself on positive thoughts and grab the anchor of trust that “things are always working out for me”.
I hope you found the webinar as well as these accompanying notes useful – please leave a comment to let me know.
Much love and appreciation,
PS: There is a part two to this discussion, and that is “unconditional living” or living each day from a place of being “unconditional” – giving and receiving unconditional love – sign up for the webinar here.