As I send these people love, I have to keep reminding myself that things always work out and that my friends have guidance and are capable of thinking better feeling thoughts. It’s that whole concept of making sure you give yourself oxygen before helping others.
I wonder why Kurt made his transition…was he bored with life? Did life hold no joy for him or did he have an agreement to be the reason for the expansion of his family, his son, his wife and his parents? In either case, the only thing I can think of is that I have another non-physical friend, and that his loved ones who are still in physical form have guidance, and that things will work out for them.
My other two friends…well, in my opinion the thing that happens when a diagnosis is declared is that people suddenly feel as if someone has forcibly taken away their ability to control their own lives. I think that the best thing I can do for them as their friend and well wisher is to help them regain control – to help them understand that they can change things by changing the way they think and feel. That they can help their husbands the most when they continue to hold their place high on the emotional scale and call their husbands up the scale instead of joining them at a place of worry and anxiety.
I am blessed in the sense that my friends are open to the advice I give them. Perhaps my sharing of my experience will help you help someone too. It was easy for me to explain to my friends that the bulk of our thoughts are on autopilot, in the sense that we have very little awareness of how we’re thinking our thoughts. In order to improve things we need to take back manual control in the sense that we need to be more aware of what we’re thinking. The easiest way to do so is to pre-pave. Pre-paving or setting our intention is the best way for us to exercise manual control. I explained to my friends that if they set their vibrational tone by intending that their hospital visits will bring their husbands closer to recovery, and that they will get the best medical attention available then if their thoughts stray away from this intention at some point in time their mind will remind them that they are off course and should come back – just like a GPS. But if they ignore setting a direction then the GPS cannot guide them – make sense? That’s why the process of pre-paving is so important, it helps us know when we go off course.
Then I explained to them that trust and worry are opposite energies, and they literally pull us in two different directions. Think about it for a minute. When we say that we have trust in God, the Universe or a higher power, then that implies that there is nothing to worry about because that higher power will orchestrate the best possible outcome. But worry implies that we don’t trust that things will work out in our favour therefore we feel the need to control all the moving parts as much as possible in order to get the desired outcome or best possible outcome. The bottom line is we can’t say that we trust and have faith and worry at the same time.
Take this logic a step further. When we worry, we are basically complaining and being ungrateful – because the implicit thought behind worrying is that “things are not working the way I want them too, and I don’t trust that they will work out the way I want them to, so I am not happy and satisfied with where I am”. This sort of thinking takes us down the emotional scale. Whether you look at it from a religious perspective or through the lens of the Law of Attraction, being ungrateful doesn’t get us very far – does it?
One of the earliest things I figured out on my journey was the fact that prayer is misunderstood. This was the next thing I wanted my friends to understand. God – the Universe is listening to every thought we think and responding to every thought we think. Therefore, we have to make sure that the bulk of our thoughts are thoughts of thankfulness and appreciation, or forward looking thoughts. Really the best use of prayer time is to spend it in appreciation and thankfulness – this takes us up the emotional scale to a place of peace within, satisfaction with where we are, and opens up possibilities that are not available to us when we are feeling anger or other negative emotions.
The next thing I explained to them was that at any moment in time we have six thinking choices. We can decide what sort of thoughts we want to think – we can think about good things that happened in our past or bad things, we can find things to appreciate in our now or focus on things that aren’t working, we can look towards the future with hope or despair. Most often we don’t exercise these choices consciously; we allow our autopilot to make the choices for us.
Our autopilot is the storage place of our beliefs and our momentum on them – most people refer to this as sub-conscious mind. The reason I prefer not to use the term “subconscious” is because it implies that we don’t have control over it. I believe that we can make the choice to have control, and that we can reprogram our autopilot. I explain how in the video below, using an analogy that is easy to remember and apply in our daily lives.
It gave me a lot of peace to be able to help my friends. The one thing I learnt from the process is that Law of Attraction concepts are just common sense and when you explain them to people in a matter of fact way using analogies and examples that are part of our everyday life, every one can relate to them. Instead of starting with the Law of Attraction and explaining what it is, it is far more effective to start with common-sensical things that everyone can relate to and then at the end tie it in to the Law of Attraction. After all, the concepts that are at the foundation of the Law of Attraction have always been known to humanity, they are at the basis of every religion and all successful people refer to them in different ways. The term “Law of Attraction” was coined by Abraham Hicks and became mainstream because of the Secret movie – so the terminology is new but the concepts are age old.
The most important ingredient in helping a friend is to see them as empowered beings. If we start feeling sorry for our friends and thinking that their situation is hard or difficult, then we actually create a negative visualization. If we really want to help our friends we have to think of them as empowered beings who have guidance and the love of Source; we have to see positive outcomes and help them to believe in hope as opposed to despair. Some of my favourite words from Abraham are: “you can come to it with hope or you can come to it from despair, and that is the difference between recovery or not”. Let us be a beacon of hope for everyone whose life touches ours.
Much love and appreciation
CONNECT WITH ME: