This book is all about relationships and co-creation with others. It is a very clarifying book. It talks about how we grow up and learn things from the people around us. It deals with a lot of questions about right and wrong especially with respect to our relationship with others.
The book gets pretty specific as it talks about all the different roles we play in life, that of a child, a sibling, a friend, a parent, a partner or spouse, an employee, a citizen and countless others. It explains why people act the way they do, and how we are responsible for the behavior we derive and how we can change that.
The book is organized in an interesting manner, the chapters are 22 false premises about how things work and Jerry guides us through asking questions that we have all asked at some point in time.
I think that my biggest take away from this book was learning that I am really truly in control of how others behave towards me and that I have power of influence over them, meaning that I can change how they behave simply by thinking about them and about my relationship with them differently. Learning this has helped me to improve all my relationships, especially with my children – you see it is one thing to love your children and quite another thing for your children to actually feel loved.
Life becomes very different when you know that you control the way people behave towards you – there are no guessing games any more, no more politics in the family or at work; it’s just a very happy, very peaceful way to live.